I’m coming to the end of my 21-Day challenge.  So far, down 13 pounds.  I’m really happy about that.  I realize it’s going to be a rough couple of weeks ahead though.  My 21-day challenge actually ends on Christmas Eve.  I’ve been steadfastly sticking to the My Fit Foods plan, with the exception of some white wine I had last weekend.   I’m not sure what comes after the 21-day plan.  I’m going to have to learn how to cook these types of meals.  Not sure where I will figure out how to do that, short of cook books and web sites.  I may continue to get meals from My Fit Foods.

I wasn’t able to attend the ATX100 Saturday meeting this weekend because I had to take a short holiday day trip to Houston.  I did sign back up for the gym, however.  I was surprised how much easier it was to do a half-hour on the treadmill.  My main issue right now is finding out a convenient time to go there.

This is just a short update.  I have a longer post I want to write, but haven’t been able to fit that into my schedule yet.  But, so far so good. Still motivated and working toward my long term goal of essentially having a life.  

I know these results are unusual and more a reflection of the sheer mass I need to shed (and more likely a lot of water weight), but 9 pounds loss for the first week still is rewarding.  Yay!

I attended the group meeting yesterday down at RunTex.  It appears they’ve combined the two groups (ATX100 and ATX50) for the Saturday meeting.  This is fine by me, because the fitness levels seems to make more sense.  Considering I’m new and not conditioned at all, I imagine another newbie who had less to lose would feel fine tracking along with me at the beginner level.

Where it does make a difference, however, is in the group dynamic.  There’s an active Facebook group page where many of the members who’ve bonded over the past few months get a lot of support from each other.  Some in the group feel the 100 pounds+ group has unique issues they’d like to share only with their peers.  This makes sense to me, as I’ve spent the last few years running a peer-only community.

The surprising perk I realized yesterday, however, is that I too now have a peer group with whom I can discuss my issues.  On our two-mile walk yesterday, I spent the entire time talking to a another peer and felt so comfortable about talking openly about many issues surrounding obesity that we all share.  Austin ranks in the top 10 cities in the country for fitness, so there is much peer pressure here to eat right (Whole Foods was founded here) and be active.   After I get to know more people, I may suggest we create a Ning network where there can be more robust online sharing in a private community.

In my industry, there is a popular study that always makes me cringe when I hear it during industry conferences.*  The study asserts that social networks influence obesity.  I often joke that one of my colleagues (who uses this study in his presentations) won’t connect socially to me because he’s afraid he’ll become obese.  The truth is, this study does not apply to me at all.  I don’t have any friends who need to lose 100 pounds.  Some of my female friends are in varying stages of “I’m overweight!,” but I know very few females who are not on that spectrum somewhere.

Yet, the converse of that study, that people who opt-in to a network of peers (in this case, obesity) can influence each other very positively.  I’m going to put it to the test and see if it makes the difference when I eventually get to that plateau that has me start listening to that inner mocking voice that says, “Why are you doing this?  This is pointless and futile.”

To that end, I sighed up for Runkeeper.  I also heard from Zach Lynch, founder of HealthRally.  He said they have an alpha I could sign up for, but he said it would be better if I could wait for the beta that will be released in a few weeks.  I decided to wait, but have good feelings about it.  It seems HealthRally might be a way to involve my larger social graph in my journey.

So, I’m on day 6 of my 21-day challenge.  I’ve been religiously sticking to it (well, except the drinking of liver blood part).  I haven’t been feeling well, so I’m not sure if it’s a touch of the flu coming on or if the detox is really working over my inner gears.

I haven’t been exercising, until today.  There is a lovely park about a mile away from me that has a long walking trail. I went early this morning and there was this spooky layer of fog that hung low across the landscape.  It was kind of beautiful.  The temperature was in the 40s, but not too cold with just a sweatshirt on.  I downloaded the “This Morning” Wall Street Journal podcast on iTunes which runs 36 minutes.  It comes out every day, so this is just about the right time I need to walk around the park or my neighborhood.  If it’s too cold, I’ll use the treadmill.  I think I’ll pick up a pedometer this weekend.  Thinking I should wait for the fitbit until I know I’m definitely going to stay on track.

Tomorrow, there is a “cheat” meal on the 21-day challenge plan.  The literature cautions you to avoid alcohol, caffeine, artificial sweeteners, and dessert.  It’s like faux cheating.  Not much fun in that!

I was also thinking of renewing my membership to the gym.  I have this amazing gym very close by, Life Time Fitness.  It’s like the Country Club of gyms.  Again, think I’ll wait until I keep progressing along.  I haven’t weighed myself again, because I don’t want to get disappointed if the scale doesn’t meet my mental expectations.  Tomorrow is another ATX100 meeting.  I’m looking forward to that.  I may take it easy on the exercise part, as the group is about 3 months conditioned where I’m just beginning. I think I mentioned they’re starting a new program in January, so I’d rather track with that.

Thought it was time to update this blog.  I stopped working with Clara around Christmas time.  I stopped for a few reasons.  A number of events have triggered a change in my philosophy about myself and my self-image.  Most recently, I was inspired by the Kevin Smith controversy.  Along with some other serious events taking place in my personal life, I realized it’s time to stop trying to be thin in order to conform to someone else’s ideal of perfection. There are some things I miss about being thin and most of them are vanity related.  For instance, the clothing choices for fat people are abysmal.  I miss not being judged (negatively) and discriminated against purely because of my appearance.  Of course, when I was thin and beautiful, I was judged positively when I so clearly did not deserve any special treatment. I also received prejudicial preferences solely due to my looks.  Being honest, that I do miss, but I know now it’s wrong.

Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs points to the ultimate state of being as “self-actualization.”  When I think about where I am at this stage in my life, the criteria that comprise self-actualization pretty much define me.  Why am I trying to make myself something I’m not?  When I see photos of myself around the web, I’m usually laughing or otherwise enjoying myself.

If society is hell bent on rejecting my looks, then so be it.  I have come to a place where I’m accepting the fact I’ll never be thin again.  That the new normal is fat for me, and it’s really not terrible.   I may stop writing in this blog.  Or, I may throw in with the fat acceptance bloggers.   Haven’t made up my mind.  All I know for today is it’s a beautiful day in Austin, and I’m getting outside.

So, I’ve been faithful to working out and really watching the eating.  But, after nearly a month, I have only lost ten pounds.  I expressed my disappointment to Clara, and she told me I was exactly where I was supposed to be.  I’m somewhat frustrated though, so I decided to go hard core on South Beach again for a phase one, two week session.  I’m entering my second week now and although it is hard, I have been able to stay focused.

The exercise has been getting easier.  Clara has me doing a program on the treadmill called, “HIIT training.”  It’s basically a phased cardio workout that compresses the time you need to get a full workout in.  Once I do a base level fairly easily, I increase the speed and do that for a few days.  At the height of the routine, I’m walking much faster than I did on the treadmill I used at the Toms River gym.

She’s also teaching me exercises I can do in my room at the hotel when I have to travel.  I have a lot of travel coming up, so that’s a good idea. I’m still using the pedometer too.  On a good day, I’ll get over 8,000 steps in, although she says the goal is probably more near 10,000.

So, all in all, even though the scale frustrates me, I feel generally good about all this and am determined to continue.